A book review of Daniel Henderson’s “Transforming Prayer” through personal anecdotes to show the spiritual awakening of reevaluating our approach to prayer. Instead of seeking God’s hand, what if we sought His face? Are our prayers to magnify God or lessen our load? 

Jesus & Oprah

JESUS: “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, it will be opened.” Matthew 7:7-8

As a new Christian, I remember reading that passage and getting wildly excited. Did Jesus really throw out an all-expenses paid, open-ended, free pass to answer every prayer request I ever make? It reminded me of that Oprah clip where an excited audience learns the namesake talk show host has gifted everyone a new car. 

“You get a car! You get a car! You get a car! Everybody gets a car!”

During college, I had an on-again-off-again (ad nauseam) girlfriend. During one particularly heated breakup, she argued, “All we have to do is pray for us to work, and God will make it happen! The Bible literally says, ‘Ask, and it will be given.’” 

That moment it clicked, I wasn’t “getting a new car.”

I don’t tell that story to dispute her faith or belittle her for fighting to salvage our relationship because her intentions were loving and virtuous. However, I share it to emphasize that many of us misquote that verse and turn to God as our sky genie rather than the Lord of the Universe. 

How often do we take the same approach to that verse? Both my college girlfriend and I knew we weren’t going to work. Instead of seeking His will for our future, we selfishly hoped the magic sky genie would fix our incompatibility issues if we just prayed a little harder. 

When reading the verse at face value, the logic tracts. But that argument confused my understanding of discourse with the Father and what a prayer request should look like. 

[READ MORE: What is Prayer]

Searching for the Perfect Recipe

After Rev. Paul Lawler recommended Transforming Prayer by Daniel Henderson several times, I happened to stumble upon it in a digital discount bin and figured, “Why not?”

A two-fold awareness comes with reading books such as Transforming Prayer. 

1) God’s Glory

First is the awareness that I’m stepping into a new reality of my relationship with God. The wisdom shared is an exciting new development for my sanctification and a reclamation of my constantly waning need for a reminder of God’s love. 

2) I Am Wretched

The second is recognizing my wretchedness in light of God’s glory. I am an inherently selfish person that’s entered a one-sided relationship with God based on my poor and self-serving intentions. 

“Our flesh struggles to pray in alignment with the truth of God’s glory. Our prayer lists can easily become so saturated with our desires for ease, comfort, convenience, and accomplishment that the goal of God’s glory becomes obscured. When our goals and God’s glory conflict, it can be hard for our hearts to choose.” Daniel Henderson, author

In full confession, even after realizing that prayer wasn’t an Oprah-styled giveaway, my prayer time was primarily spent seeking God’s hand instead of His face. With a little more understanding of the verses in Matthew, I thought, “Hey, as long as I read the Bible and behave, I can ask anything I want, right?” 

Wrong. Again. 

Transforming Prayer’s objective is to provide an “agonizing alignment.” We might be conscious of it but unaware of what it aims to correct.

“Many of us fail to focus our prayers on the core motive: that God would be magnified in everything we seek or say. Our prayers are often viewed as a divinely ordained way to get what we want out of life or avoid what we don’t want. It is easy to fall into the trap of thinking prayer exists so God can be used to help us preserve our glory rather than our being used to promote His glory.” Henderson

Previously, I felt like my prayers were in this search for the perfect recipe. I was throwing words, phrases, -isms, and cliches against the wall hoping that by some divine chance, I’d string together enough of the “right things” to get what I sought. 

In reality, that concoction is only a bitter representation of my heart’s selfishness, and it left little more than disappointment and frustration in my misguided approach. “Why isn’t God answering my prayers?!” 

[READ MORE: Why Doesn’t God Answer My Prayers?]

A New Approach to Prayer Requests

Many Christ Church members were able to participate in a string of Prayer Summits in early 2023. These half-day events were marketed as an opportunity to pray for hours. I’ll be candid; this wasn’t how I wanted to spend my Saturday. Inside, eyes closed (and awake), praying for Randall’s gout and Edna’s son-in-law to get a job. 

However, if you ask any participant about their experience at those events, you’ll hear stories of the Holy Spirit movement, deep peace, spiritual awakening, and a renewed interest in prayer. 

The difference? These gatherings weren’t “organ recitals” (a chance to pray for every attendee’s illness and failing bodies) but times of worship-based prayer. 

Henderson describes worship-based prayer as bringing “our hearts into intimate harmony with the person of the Holy Spirit and enhancing our surrender to His control, wisdom, and power for our prayers. The Spirit then enables us to worship more fully. This worship, in turn, brings us into a deeper reality of the Spirit’s life, thus continuing the circle.”

Transforming Prayer, as well as the Prayer Summits, remind us that prayer is not about us. The focus and core motive should be that God be magnified in everything we seek or say. So, when we approach the throne to request job promotions, new cars, dating relationships, and final exams, it adds a new perspective of “How is God magnified by my pursuits here?” 

Let’s be clear, praying for any of those things isn’t inherently wrong. God repeatedly tells us He wants to hear from His children, and these can be factors of significant life events. However, when we review Appendix 4 in Transforming Prayer, which lists the items of the Apostle Paul’s prayer list, it calls into question the mundane of what we often bring before God. At the core of every documented request, the Apostle Paul called for the Gospel to be shared, God’s love to be accepted, and souls to be reclaimed. 

As a new dad, one of my recent self-centered prayers has been about equipping myself for fatherhood. But reading this book forced me to step back and reevaluate my intentionality in that request. Was that for my own gratification as an “Instagram Dad,” or so I raise my daughter according to the Lord’s calling? 

The answer came in the most unlikely place: my contractor. 

God recalled a conversation I had with him months before starting this book. As we discussed fatherhood, my contractor told me, “As the husband/father/spiritual leader of your home, you have to be the altar because no one can pray for your child as you can.”

In consideration of worship-based prayer, I experienced a shift. There’s nothing wrong with asking God to increase my parenting abilities. However, when reviewing my intentions, that’s where the Lord convicted me. It was a paradigm shift of holy proportions. 

When I come before God as an altar for my daughter, the goal is not to be the fun or friendly dad but the one who raises the child He’s entrusted to me in His love and authority.

No More Blessings

More than a decade ago, I ventured into South Memphis to attend the Rev. Al Green’s church. Yes, the “Let’s Stay Together,” “Love and Happiness,” “Tired of Being Alone,” Al Green. Attendance was small, probably less than 50 people, and it was a wonderful mix of regular attendees and spectators such as myself. 

However, where I attended, hoping for a Christian message delivered by a beloved singer-turned-reverend, I walked away with one of the most encouraging messages I’ve ever received. During his sermon, Rev. Green said, “If God never blesses me again, I have no reason to complain because He’s already blessed me far more than I ever deserved.”

Nearing 15 years later, I still recite that quote amid trials and grief, but after reading Transforming Prayer, how does that apply to my prayer life? Shouldn’t that be an application and an approach to worship-based prayer? Why do I need to ask God for anything when I’ve already received far more than I deserve? 

When I am in the Word and not only listening for but following the Holy Spirit’s directive, I don’t need to ask for anything. Gratitude overwhelms me, and I’m left in awe of God’s provisions already in front of me. What I do end up asking for is a continual outpouring of His presence to serve His kingdom. 

I hate to spoil the ending, but as Henderson closes Transforming Prayer, “May God be magnified!”