What To Do When You Feel Stuck In Life
Feel stuck in a rut? Why do we resist change? Getting through a tough time is not easy. But life is about finding God’s growth that He has for us. Here are three ways to get unstuck.
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1 Early in the morning Joshua and all the Israelites set out from Shittim and went to the Jordan, where they camped before crossing over. 2 After three days the officers went throughout the camp, 3 giving orders to the people: “When you see the ark of the covenant of the Lord your God, and the Levitical priests carrying it, you are to move out from your positions and follow it. 4 Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before. But keep a distance of about two thousand cubits[a] between you and the ark; do not go near it.”
5 Joshua told the people, “Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you.”
6 Joshua said to the priests, “Take up the ark of the covenant and pass on ahead of the people.” So they took it up and went ahead of them.
7 And the Lord said to Joshua, “Today I will begin to exalt you in the eyes of all Israel, so they may know that I am with you as I was with Moses. 8 Tell the priests who carry the ark of the covenant: ‘When you reach the edge of the Jordan’s waters, go and stand in the river.’”
9 Joshua said to the Israelites, “Come here and listen to the words of the Lord your God. 10 This is how you will know that the living God is among you and that he will certainly drive out before you the Canaanites, Hittites, Hivites, Perizzites, Girgashites, Amorites and Jebusites. 11 See, the ark of the covenant of the Lord of all the earth will go into the Jordan ahead of you. 12 Now then, choose twelve men from the tribes of Israel, one from each tribe. 13 And as soon as the priests who carry the ark of the Lord—the Lord of all the earth—set foot in the Jordan, its waters flowing downstream will be cut off and stand up in a heap.”
14 So when the people broke camp to cross the Jordan, the priests carrying the ark of the covenant went ahead of them. 15 Now the Jordan is at flood stage all during harvest. Yet as soon as the priests who carried the ark reached the Jordan and their feet touched the water’s edge, 16 the water from upstream stopped flowing. It piled up in a heap a great distance away, at a town called Adam in the vicinity of Zarethan, while the water flowing down to the Sea of the Arabah (that is, the Dead Sea) was completely cut off. So the people crossed over opposite Jericho. 17 The priests who carried the ark of the covenant of the Lord stopped in the middle of the Jordan and stood on dry ground, while all Israel passed by until the whole nation had completed the crossing on dry ground.
There's not one of us that's breathing today that doesn't know what it's like to be in the wilderness in some way. We're all familiar with the feeling of being lost in life. We wake up and dread the day ahead of us as if we're chained to our circumstances. But, folks, there are a lot of times that we want to change things because we're sick and tired of the season in our lives.
But your time in the wilderness is not wasted, especially if we give those hard times to God. He uses them as a kind of personal boot camp. They are a time for us to be strengthened and prepared for the changes and new seasons ahead of us.
It's a lot easier said than done, but instead of fearing times of change, think of crossover times as wonderful. Let me explain why I chose that word. They're wonderful because they're packed with potential. We don't believe this deeply enough, but God's plan for our lives is one of growth. It's one of development and transformation. The way God designed our lives, we are not meant to be stuck. You say, "Well, the potential for change sounds great, but the other side of the crossing is fraught with tremendous difficulties."
You may not realize it, but God has been preparing you for this very moment. There have been tiny instances that may have gone unnoticed at the time, but in retrospect, you can see where God was getting you ready for the next step. And when that moment comes, He'll let you know it's time to move out, cross the threshold of change and begin a new season.
It's like a parent telling a toddler, you've been potty training long enough. We spent a fortune on diapers; it's time to use the big potty now. When you've been lost in the wilderness for an extended period, it's easy to lose hope. For too long, you've told yourself, "I can't do this. It's just too hard." It's time to be reminded that God has brought you to this point, and with Jesus' help, you can do this. No matter what.
If you're having trouble believing that, look at our scripture. God called His people out of the wilderness and to cross the Jordan. It was time for them to step into the Promised Land! They'd been wandering for decades. They were tired and had lost hope. Can you imagine forty years of wandering? It'd be hard to believe you hadn't been led astray. But the time finally came, and when they approached the waters of the rushing river, did they have the faith to cross?
Why Don't We Allow Ourselves to Get Unstuck?
1) We Resist Change
There's almost always some pain associated with change. It is very real, and don't let anyone tell you that it's not. There's something about us that clings to the familiar and struggles to let go, even if what needs to be changed is killing us. In our determination and fear, we can camp on the banks of what's familiar until our resistance to change is stronger than our willingness to change.
Building walls is a work of the flesh, but building windmills is a work of the Spirit. Building walls shut the door on future potential, fruitfulness, and growth. Building a windmill says, "God if you lead me and are the one calling for the change, and I want to be open to what you have for me."
“When the winds of change blow, some people build walls, and others build windmills.”
Sometimes God will move us in ways that are not controlled, manipulated, or predicted by us. We say, "God bless my life, but let me tell you how to do it." Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than that of change.
If you've been stuck for too long, it doesn't matter how God brings change. We can become so miserable that it can be a blessing. You no longer care because you know the misery on the other side. God can use our pain to be a blessing in disguise and bring us to the place where we say to God, "I'm still afraid, but I can't take where I am any longer."
If God is the one calling for the change, we need to look for the striking opportunity in every place God brings us to.
2) We Resist Anticipation
I've had people tell me that they're afraid to have hope. After too many things didn't work out, these people are so scared that if they find a place of hope, they will be disappointed again. We keep ourselves from anticipating what God has for us in His kindness and mercy. God wants us to taste the goodness of His heart, yet we cling to the anxiety of not knowing what's on the other side of change.
The day the Israelites crossed the Jordan, can you imagine the anticipation? Two million people gathered at the banks of the river. Nobody slept in that day, and they probably didn't sleep much the night before either! But, God told them that miracles await you if you move to the banks and do what I ask you to do. It was the end of their journey and their chance to accept the generous gift He provided.
You're not called to be a settler. I'm not talking about geography; I'm talking spiritually. But here is the challenge, and it's such an irony, but it's the way God works. They were asked to cross the banks of the Jordan, and they were asked to cross the river during flood season. I've been there; It's 90 feet wide and six feet deep. I can touch the bottom and barely see if I'm tiptoeing.
But in the spring, when the snow atop Mount Hermon melts and flows into the Jordan River. It swells from 90 feet wide to 500 feet wide, and it's gushing. The idea of crossing that river is absolutely unthinkable. So how did they cross?
How Do We Cross into the Promised Land?
When we come to any transition, any crossroads – and there are so many – from choices of college to careers, marriage, moves, loss of any kind, including disease, divorce or death, and so many potential crises that we could never predict, God has a massive heart of sympathy for us. He knows our fears and uncertainties of an unknown future, and it brings great joy to our Father's heart to help us pass over the crossover.
Most of us say we're willing to change as long as we know that everything's going to be okay. But change rarely happens at a convenient time. Every man, woman, child, and infant had to cross that river—the hearty and the healthy, as well as the feeble, sick, and disabled. God intentionally chose the flood season to remind them of who He is. This journey will always be fraught with danger.
"Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
Maybe it's flood season in your life, but you sense God is calling for a change. Do you wonder how you can crossover? God's people are given direction.
How to Get Unstuck and Step Out in Courage
1) Follow the Lord
During the Israelites wandering, the Ark of the Covenant was carried from location to location as a portable symbol of God's throne. The Ark contained three items to remind His people.
The 10 Commandments: Reminder to obey the Word of God.
Jar of Manna: Reminder that God would take care of them (like He will take care of you!).
Aaron's rod: Reminder that in every new season, God raises new leaders.
Today, we don't look to the Ark of the Covenant for these reminders. Instead, God's presence was made real to us through Jesus Christ and His Holy Spirit.
If you're in a season of crisis or wandering, it can be hard to keep your eyes affixed to God's reminders. You may say, "Times are so tough, I don't feel God's presence." You're not the first, and you're not alone.
In his classic book, The Taste of New Wine, Keith Miller reminds us that having faith doesn't always mean having a feeling. They are two different things, and if we always had the feeling, we wouldn't need the faith. We don't want feeling God's presence to become an idol in our lives. Instead, we should pray that God would teach us how to live on what Miller called "raw faith." When we trust God to be with us, even when we have no conscious sense of His presence, we are offering back to Him as an act of worship the gift of faith.
David said, "I have set the Lord always before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.” Not "I feel" or "I sense," but "I set." I make a deliberate and conscious resolve to put God front and center in all of my life and thinking – He is my focus.
2) Consecrate Yourself
One teacher said sanctification is God's part, but consecration is our part. We must dedicate ourselves to God's purposes, and that's what He asked of His people as they crossed the Jordan. Allen Redpath said, "God doesn't use clever people, but consecrated people."
We spend a lot of time in the church's life, trying to play worship to be just suitable for everyone's preferences. But, honestly, it never works. God's looking for consecrated people who say, "Lord, in this season of change, we want to follow you. We may kick and scream, but please, allow your Spirit of willingness in our hearts to be greater than our resistance."
Consecration is not us telling God what we will do for Him. But it's signing ourselves over and letting Him tell us what He wants to do.
3) Follow Courageous Leadership
If God's people are to live courageously, God calls His spiritual leaders to lead courageously. This is so important. As pastors and spiritual leaders, we often get a pass from the people because you see yourself as sort of less than you see us. Besides prayer, the greatest gift you can offer to your spiritual leaders is to hold us accountable to the standards of God's word. Nobody should get a pass. We won't do it perfectly, and we need lots of grace, but we also need standards.
"When you reach the edge of the Jordan's waters, go and stand in the river." Joshua 3.8
When you find yourself on the edge, and maybe you're on edge today, take that step.
The Israelites were at the edge of a raging river. But the scripture tells us that as soon as the priest's feet touched the water's edge, the water from the upstream stopped flowing in the distance. So all two million crossed to dry ground. Nothing changed until they got to the edge, and they stepped.
The growth of fruit always follows faith. May God give you the grace and the courage needed to take that step to the edge of the banks. He will see you through.
TL;DR
We’ve all experienced prolonged seasons of stagnation, confusion, frustration, and wilderness.
God’s plan for our lives is one of growth and transformation.
We keep ourselves from change because we are resist change and anticipation.
Change rarely happens when it’s convenient.
We get unstuck by:
Following the Lord
Consecrating our lives.
Following courageous leadership.
Related Reading
Four Reminders to Finding Courage by Bro. Chris Carter
Finding Peace in New Beginnings by Rev. Shane Stanford
About Christ Church Memphis
Christ Church Memphis is church in East Memphis, Tennessee. For more than 65 years, Christ Church has served the Memphis community. Every weekend, there are multiple worship opportunities including traditional, contemporary and blended services.
